Ours is a fairly close knit family, with similar values, morals and ethics. So, our outlook on most things in life are quite similar and we tend to agree on nearly everything. The operative word is 'nearly'. The one thing that we do not is - "When do we celebrate Krishna Jayanthi?" In my living memory, I do not remember a single instance where all of us, including my uncles and aunts, on even one of paternal or maternal side, have celebrated this festival on the same day. And if you include friends and neighbors, Krishna is born several times over a few days (or even weeks sometimes) in the same year.
One might wonder why all this confusion. As the name clearly indicates, Janmashtami or Gokulashtami, should be celebrated on the Ashtami thithi, no? To be precise, the Krishna Paksha Ashtami in the month of Shravana. But alas, as with most things in life, nothing is as simple as it sounds. This thithi business is confusing. They do not align nicely with midnight or sun rise. It has a mind of its own. So, some part of thithi in a day could be Sapthami and some part Ashtami. Now, wars have been waged and reams of paper (or palm leaves) spent on how to choose which of the thithis will need to be ascribed for the day. Multiple conflict resolution algorithms exist - the thithi at the time of sunrise, the thithi at midnight and some thousand combinations thereof. Every religious sect leader has their own favorite conflict resolution algorithm. And, for different events, different algorithms. Being the great intellectuals that we are, we just will not let go off an opportunity to complicate simple things. OK, is this all? Of course not. There are the other set of people who strongly profess that Krishna was born on the Rohini star and hence we should celebrate his birthday then and only then. What happens if the Rohini star is not on Ashtami. It does not matter. Any Rohini after the Saptami thithi is good.
Why is this important? Only one reason. Krishna Jayanthi is the festival where we make a lot of sweets and savories. So, while all your neighbors are celebrating their festival early and enjoying the sweets, you will have to just wait for the festival to celebrated in your home before you can join the fun, all because one of your forefathers, several generations ago, decided to distinguish themselves from their neighbors and chose a different day. This wait is even a greater torture than the Marshmallow test for the 4 year olds. We are not interested in testing our self-discipline. Just give us our seedai, thattai and murkku. That is all.
I like the US way of identifying and celebrating holidays. Totally deterministic. Labor day is the first Monday in September. Who cares if the rest of the world celebrates it on May 1. Presidents day is the third Monday in February. Taking a leaf from that book, I propose to form a new religious sect with very clear algorithms for deciding festival dates. We will celebrate festivals on a purely first-come-first-serve basis. At the earliest eligible opportunity, we should celebrate the festival. If Rohini comes first, that is our day. Even if there is a milli-second of Ashtami, it is our day. Just simplify with clear deterministic algorithm. No more discrimination because your sub-sect of 100 people from this remote village, 75Km from Thanjavur, chose a different conflict resolution algorithm for no apparent reason. It will be a total egalitarian world.
I am welcoming registrations and enrolments to this sect, at a nominal fees. If there is sufficient interest, we can even buy the island next to Kailasa. Please do let me know while I go off and munch my வெல்ல சீடை.
